The Power of Love

How to make room for it and promote it in the Family Office

This is probably not the favorite topic among professionals in the field, and yet, love is indeed present in our lives ; and hopefully, at the heart of our families. Therefore, once we view the family office as a servant of the family and its short- and long-term interests, love should be considered an important subject.

It must be viewed as a family asset, on the same level as financial, intellectual, or reputational capital. As such, family office professionals are responsible for preserving it, optimizing it, and passing it on to future generations ; and more broadly, to society.

This unusual perspective seems necessary, especially when we hear testimonials about the lack of love ; or rather, displayed affection ; within privileged families (e.g.: France Inter, Le Temps).

Why Is It Important?

When love is seen as a component of family capital, it becomes a concern of the family office, which then takes on responsibility for it.

Just like other types of assets, love has a role to play. Real estate for long-term wealth, commodities to counter inflation, bonds for protection, alternatives for generating alpha, intellectual capital for succession planning, human capital for talent management, etc.

Each element is there for a specific reason. The role of the family office goes beyond financial growth ; it ensures optimal orchestration and harmony of all these diverse elements that make up what we commonly call « wealth. »

It seems surprising, naive, or even risky to ignore emotional aspects in managing a family office. Love should be accounted for ; first, to avoid it becoming a threat to family balance, but also because it would be a shame to miss out on such a driving force.

In matters of succession planning, preparing new generations, family coherence and cohesion, as well as mental health and well-being, love is the gentle touch that helps things go down easier. Ignoring it would be foolish.

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How to Make Room for Love?

Love is, or should be, present on multiple levels. It manifests in different ways and languages depending on the situation. Here are a few ways to give it space and a voice.

For Oneself

At this level, we talk about well-being, mental and physical health, calmness, and time management of the principal.

• Appoint a « Chief Wellness Officer » (e.g., Dr. Gregory Charlop) to create a personalized plan involving physical activity, dietary balance, or well-being-enhancing outings.
• Develop a decision tree and effective protocols so the family office team can act independently, without constantly consulting the founder. Control processes and benchmarks also ensure peace of mind.
• Define success markers that are not linked to financial performance, e.g., number of relaxation moments, sleep quality, etc.
• Ensure everyone has access to top-tier medical care, with preventative appointments and regular check-ups ; paying particular attention to men’s health, as advocated by Ross Tomkins.
• Watch for signs of distress such as substance abuse and have a proactive response plan.
• Don’t underestimate the importance of mental health ; especially for leaders and founders. See Masawa’s excellent work in the VC investment world on this topic.

Within the Couple

In the couple behind the family office, love obviously takes on deep meaning. Here are some tips to nurture it:

• Set aside couple time in the principal’s calendar ; dinners, retreats, one-on-one activities. The family office must protect these moments from operational intrusions.
• Harmonize authority between partners. Define early on who decides what, how, and why to avoid conflicts.
• Celebrate key events (e.g., wedding anniversaries). In general, celebrate joyful moments and keep their memory alive.
• Consider each spouse’s personal wishes and maintain healthy boundaries between the couple and the family office.

Within the Family

Family relationships are central to this topic. This is where a conscious and vibrant expression of love can have the greatest impact. Consider:

• Give time back to the family. Time spent together is a major form of wealth. A well-managed family office can help free up time for quality family moments. Schedule uninterrupted time, propose activities, and provide resources focused on parent-child relationships.
• Reserve a space and regular schedule for extended family gatherings to strengthen cousin, grandparent-grandchild relationships, etc. E.g., a seaside home for summer reunions.
• Pay attention to siblings and promote healthy communication. The family office ensures equal access to information and other key matters.
• Family therapy may improve tough dynamics. Professionals like Dr. Shay Harris-Pierre, Dr. Moira Somers, Antonia Da Silva, Dr. Ronit Lami, Dr. Jan-Hendrick Taubert, among others, can work wonders. The family office should build a network of trusted partners for such matters.
• Preserve and highlight the family’s history and memory. The Legacy Atelier offers excellent services in this regard ; Zita does an outstanding work for families. If you want to publish your family story, consider Memoirs & More.

Beyond the Family

Why limit love to the family circle? UHNW families often want to extend their influence and share their privileges with society at large.

That’s the very definition of philanthropy: the love of humanity.

In my view, philanthropy is the natural extension of the family office’s role ; an expression of family values, legacy, and history.

The family office can (and should?) propose a philanthropic strategy to the family. While society benefits, so too does the family.

I will share in another article the different approaches in this area. For now, I’ll just note that there are many professionals who can advise families, such as Sharon Schneider for exemple. There is no shortage of philanthropic founder examples.

If this interests you, I encourage you to explore further and subscribe to my blog to not miss the next article dedicated to philanthropy.

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Conclusion

While love might not seem like a key or natural subject in the family office world, it undeniably has a rightful place at the heart of the family.

A well-informed family office must consider the emotional aspects of human nature. It would be foolish not to rely on the driving force of love ; in all its nuances ; in service of the family it represents.

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Written by a human in French, translated with the help of AI. Read the original version here :